Women’s History Month: Writing Our Way to the Revolution

I was surfing the internet the other day when I came across this blog that has quickly become a favorite.

GenderAcrossBorders.com describes it’s mission as being an international feminist community where issues of gender, race, sexuality, and class are discussed and critically  examined. The article that intrigued me was examining women and how we have traditionally been left out of history and what we as women can do to ensure that our stories are told in an intelligent, articulate, and accurate way.

Because it is Women’s History Month and a lot of the work that the New York City Latina Writers Group does revolves around women it immediately grabbed my attention especially because we are having two events this month that are specifically designed to address women, our past, and our future. In fact, this month’s workshop theme is Writing Women Back Into History.

In the article the author discusses how she has been reading in the media and on social networks about great women who inspired change, whether politically, socially, within the fields of science, music, the arts etc. and how inspiring it is to see so much media that sheds light about womens’ contributions to the history of the world. However, she further states that while women have made many contributions not “all of us are going to get interviewed on BBC, speak at a UN convention, amass the most followers on Twitter, or write a book that makes Oprah’s highly coveted reading list.”

I happen to agree with her. That’s just reality, but does this reality make any of us less important? No, it doesn’t — but how many of us have convinced ourselves that it does? How many inspiring women — mothers, wives, teachers, students, scientists, artists etc — equate being a part of history with being a famous celebrity, or tech innovator, winning an election, or leading a political revolution? My guess is many. But, history doesn’t always have to be so dramatic to count — it just needs to be documented.

In the article the author gives a very detailed definition of the word history: “History, contrary to the popular misconception that the word is derived from “his” and “story” put together, actually has its roots in an ancient Greek word ἱστορία (hístōr), which can mean “inquiry,” “knowledge so obtained,” or — my favorite — “a written account of one’s inquiries, narrative, history.” Note that no part of the definition of history inherently suggests a limitation of “written accounts” to men, or white people, or any other marginalized group for that matter. So why have women’s stories been (and continue to be) left out of history?”

This is the question that I continuously ask myself and the question that I am trying to eliminate with my work with the New York City Latina Writers Group. Women must start to believe that their stories matter. We must thread ourselves into the American fabric as proof that we were here, that we made a difference, so that we can leave behind a legacy for our daughters and our daughter’s daughters. If we do not document our lives who will? Who will tell our stories if we don’t? Better still, who will make sure that our stories are told accurately?

Below are some of the key points addressed in the article:

Perhaps rehashing the etymological roots of a single word won’t change the fact that history has long been recounted from the viewpoint of dominant groups; Hollywood, arguably the world’s most influential movie industry is still run by white people, or men, or Americans (depending on which way you look at it); the op-ed pages of major news outlets — through which policy and thought leadership are driven — are also dominated by men who don’t understand women’s issues; and while stories of minority groups do make their way into history archives, the fact that they are often told from the point of view of the oppressor often leads to unrealistic, dehumanizing, biased portrayals of the people whose history is being documented for them. But, embracing the revelation that history is simply “a narrative accounted for” actually makes things less complicated.

In order to address the dearth of women’s histories — our stories, and voices being undocumented, under-valued, and falsely represented without reprimand — women must begin telling their own stories. We must essentially write our way back into history. Incidentally, one doesn’t always have to “do” something huge to be someone important — sometimes sharing the complex, intersecting pieces about ourselves (and inspiring others to do the same) can do just as much, if not more, to change the world.

Now, some of you may be thinking, “Well, even if I want to write, my life is not that interesting. I’m just a [insert perceived mundane role here that has everyone wondering why you're being so self-deprecating] with nothing to say…” That is simply not true. Bertrand Russell (a man) once said, “The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.” When I think about how many boring history textbooks written by men are out there, it motivates me to keep writing, no matter how insignificant the voices in my head insist my perspective (on anything) is. And if positive-thinking doesn’t work for you, here are some other factors to consider:

  • Women are less likely to run for office in part because they don’t feel “qualified enough”
  • “Mommy Blogging” has gotten the attention of a $750 million blog marketing industry; companies want to know what moms — not “experts” — think before they spend a dime developing new products
  • The It Gets Better campaign — videos created by regular people — has dramatically increased awareness of issues facing LGBT youth
  • There are too many men who really shouldn’t be talking (Rush Limbaugh and David Bahati come to mind) writing and saying all kinds of things, and even worse influencing millions of people with their biased point of view — shouldn’t we at least join them?

See, the problem with women not telling their stories isn’t just an issue of “balance” (i.e. we need men and women’s voices in equal measure), but an issue of “influence.” Thus, the reason I write as often as I do is not because I think I have more to say — rather, I’ve learned to tap into the deep dread I feel at the thought of someone else speaking for me, now, but especially when I’m gone; someone giving my children their version of who I was instead of doing the work to make sure my children get to read my words. My writing ensures accountability to my voice, my perspective, my journey, my history, which is worth telling, and worth telling right.

So, for women’s history month, I challenge you to take charge of your own history by writing it. Instead of passively supporting history as recounted by others, how about you begin the process of formally documenting — journaling, blogging, creating art and media etc — about your own life? You could create your own blog using a free Blogger or WordPress account, sign up for Twitter and share snippets of your history using #myherstory.

Blogging and tweeting may seem trivial given the bigger picture of revolutionizing history, but tell that to the voters (29 and under) who leveraged the power of social media to elect the first US Black president, or the people of the Arab Spring who tweeted, YouTubed and shared their revolution with the world, and in turn sparked many more revolutions worldwide. Yours truly will be participating in Gender Across Border’s Blog for International Women’s Day, and thus joining thousands of women all over the world to celebrate this year’s theme, “Connecting Girls, Inspiring Futures.” You could be one of them. Your words matter. Our words matter. Words by and about women matter.

Whether you’re a male teacher who has girls in his classroom, a mother of four who loves to write erotica, a hiphop artist who has a thing to say about gender discrimination in the music industry, a bus driver who bakes cupcakes, a sibling with an outspoken, queer, activist of a sister, please speak. Please say something. You have to — the world is counting on you.

To read the article in its entirety visit: http://www.genderacrossborders.com/2012/03/06/for-womens-history-month-writing-our-way-to-the-revolution/

Sankofa: “Looking to the Past to Create the Future”

The concept of “Sankofa” is derived from King Adinkera of the Akan people of West Africa. “Sankofa” is expressed in the Akan language as ”se wo were fi na wosan kofa a yenki.” Literally translated, this means “it is not taboo to go back and fetch what you forgot”.

Sankofa teaches us that we must go back to our roots in order to move forward. That is, we should reach back and gather the best of what our past has to teach us, so that we can achieve our full potential as we move forward. Whatever we have lost, forgotten, forgone, or been stripped of can be reclaimed, revived, preserved, and perpetuated.

The Sankofa bird has its feet firmly planted forward, but its head turned backwards, with an egg, symbolizing the future, held tightly in its mouth. Not only is there wisdom in learning from the past to build the future, but we should reach back and gather the best of what our past has to teach us, so that we can achieve our full potential as we move forward. In every aspect of life – personal, spiritual, business, professional, whatever, you cannot move forward until you’ve looked back and absorbed where you’ve been.

Today’s generation has seemed to stray away from that path. We are raising a society of individuals who lack respect for their ancestors, their elders, and most importantly lack respect for themselves. They have no idea where they came from and what’s worse is that most of them have no desire to learn. After all, most of our history isn’t taught in schools so we must educate ourselves, but they have no desire to do that either.

What will become of us when our youth are more concerned with how they will buy the newest pair of Jordans rather than thinking about how they will make a difference? Where are our leaders today? We are raising a nation of followers who spend most of their time on social networks instead of reading books.

Today’s youth have somehow veered off that path of greatness that was paved for them by those who came before them, by the ancestors who sacrificed their lives so that their voices can be heard. History is not made by being silent, but instead by standing up and demanding that our voices be heard even when no one wants to listen.

On March 20, 2012 the New York City Latina Writer’s Group (NYCLWG) in collaboration with Hue-Man Bookstore will host an event where we will do just that. With an amazing line-up of performers and panelists, we will focus on honoring our past, our ancestors, and reclaiming what is ours so that we can create OUR futures.

I feel honored to be a part of such an important event. It is my responsibility to educate and to make sure that our voices are heard. We should all be responsible for teaching the young people in our lives about their history, about the importance of their lives and how what they do or don’t do impacts our legacy as a people. I encourage all of my readers to take part in this important discussion because how can you know where you are going if you don’t know where you came from. Sankofa!

Coming Full Circle

Life has a way of coming full circle. This time last year I was 3 months into my journey as a Visionera (if you follow my blog then you know what I am referring to). I decided that I would commit to myself and I spent an entire year doing self-work. I decided that I would no longer give life to the lie that had me paralyzed. The lie that convinced me that I did not deserve all of the things that I’ve always wanted. I really started digging deep into myself and confronting my fears and doubts. I started a daily meditation practice to help re-connect with my spirit, to help me really listen to my inner voice. I read a lot of self-help books, surrounded myself with like minded individuals, and attended the bi-monthly Visionera meetings. In essence, I began cultivating the seeds that had implanted in my soul to ensure that the intention I set for myself in 2011 became a reality. Following your dreams is always easier said that done, but once I made that commitment to myself I knew that I had to follow through.

A number of things came up for me when I was thinking about my intention(s). There were two specific things that I wanted to accomplish in 2011. One was to complete writing and publish my first book, which I did in September 2011. The second, was to become a mother by whatever means that would happen. I didn’t want to limit myself so I was open to anything. Any way that God wanted to send me that blessing I was open to. I was all set to go. I was ready to go all in and begin working towards my goals.

However, a funny thing happens when you commit to something. The universe begins to laugh at you. The minute you think you have everything under control a roadblock suddenly appears that you weren’t prepared for. For me, it seemed like I was hitting a brick wall every time I began to think that I was making progress.  For most people, when they are encountered with something that they weren’t prepared for they give up. They turn around because they convince themselves that continuing forward is just too much, it’s just too hard.

I will admit that I used to be one of those people. If something was becoming too much for me to deal with, I would give up. I would turn away from it or prolong it because I wasn’t strong enough to continue treading forward. Working with Visiones and committing to the self-work helped me to change how I reacted to obstacles when they appeared. Visiones and the self-work helped to re-connect me with my heart’s deepest desire. It taught me techniques to silence the inner critic that would occassionally pop up telling me that I wasn’t good enough, that I didn’t deserve it. It taught me how to take care of myself and my needs. It taught me how not to give up on what I wanted most.

So despite all of the obstacles that manifested for me in 2011, for the first time in a really long time, I didn’t give up on myself. When I got pregnant for the very first time in May 2011 and then miscarried in June, I was devastated. I was ready to give up and the old me would have. I cursed everything and everybody. I cursed women, I cursed women with children,  I cursed women who were pregnant because I wondered why them and not me. I cursed God. Because what God would plant the seed and then take it away from me.

While I was going through it those are the thoughts that went through my head, but once I was able to think clearly I realized that it wasn’t a curse or a punishment, it was a blessing. See, I have been with my husband for 14 years and for all that time I had never been pregnant. A part of me felt like I wasn’t able to despite the doctors telling me that I could. That pregnancy was affirmation that I physicially was capable of making my dream come true. As for the miscarriage, I know that that baby wasn’t my baby. For whatever reason it’s purpose was not to be born, but instead to help me finally realize that I was not this broken vessel that I had always thought myself to be.

Then only 5 months later in November, something miraculous happened. I found out that I was pregnant again. The woman who had never been pregnant became pregnant twice in one year. I am now 5 months along and in July I will finally be a mother. If I weren’t living it, I wouldn’t believe it. I am the happiest that I’ve ever been and I now look at life with fresh eyes. It is because of the work that I did with Visiones that I was able to reclaim my strength, my beauty, and my power by helping me to accept myself just as I am knowing that even through my flaws I am perfect.

Last night I got the opportunity to MC an event for the founder and director of DeAlmas Women’s Institute. She also facilitates the Visiones workshop. And as I shared my story with all of the people in that beautiful space I realized how much had changed for me in just one year. I felt strong. I felt invincible. I felt resilient. I had committed to myself and made the one thing I wanted most a reality.

So as I looked out into the crowd, I was grateful. I was proud of myself and of my commitment. And to paraphrase the Alchemist, when you truly desire something the whole universe conspires for you to get it, you just have to be willing to put in the work.

You Are More Than Good Enough

A Book Reading/Signing & Wine Reception

I have been quite busy lately. There are so many things going on; so many events, so many commitments, and not enough time to do it all. At least, that’s how I’ve been feeling. For starters, I am still trying to get used to my new professional role as an administrator at one of NYC’s public hospitals. I’ve been in my new role for about 5 months and while I have worked in health care my entire professional career, I forgot what it was like to deal with staff issues, patient issues, and customer satisfaction. It has been very overwhelming to say the least. In addition to my professional career, I am also a writing workshop facilitator for the New York City Latina Writer’s Group (NYCLWG), a  member of the DeAlmas Women’s Institute, a writer, and last but most importantly a first time expecting mom to be. Needless to say I have been EXHAUSTED. But with everything that I have going on I am truly grateful for it all.

I am grateful to have a job that allows me to meet my financial obligations, that allows me to help our patients and improve their overall health care experience, a job where I know I will be challenged every day. I am grateful to be a part of a community of writers where I can teach and learn simultaneously and as a DeAlmas Visionera, I am grateful that I have been able to re-connect with myself, my spirit, and my heart’s deepest desire. Something amazing happens when you start to believe that you truly deserve everything that you ever wanted. As women, we tend to put the needs of others before our own and somehow lose sight of the things that we want for ourselves. At least for me, that statement holds true. Being a member of DeAlmas helped me to regain sight of the things I truly wanted.

I realized that I needed to re-focus and I needed to start putting myself before others. I realized that if I wasn’t happy with myself and the direction of my life then there wouldn’t be much that I could do for others. Once I re-focused on myself, transformational things began to happen for me. First, I was able to complete writing and publishing my first book, Welcome to Heartbreak. Shortly after that I was accepted into Fairleigh Dickinson University’s MFA in creative writing program, and lastly on November 6, 2011 I found out that the one thing I had wanted most, I was finally receiving. I was pregnant with my first child.

This may not seem as something monumental for most women, but for me, after trying unsuccessfully to conceive for the past 10 yrs I had given up on that dream. I had decided that since it hadn’t happened in 10 years it probably wasn’t meant for me to be a mother. I began to feel like I wasn’t good enough to experience such a blessing. It wasn’t until I attended the DeAlmas Visiones workshop in 2011 that slowly but surely those thoughts and self doubt began to disappear. Being able to accomplish my heart’s deepest desires was a direct result of all the self-work I did in 2011 with DeAlmas. This is why I am so honored and excited to be the mistress of ceremonies for the book signing for author and founder of DeAlmas Women’s Institute, Gloria Rodriguez, being held on March 6th, 2012 from 6-9 pm at the Longwood Art Gallery at Hostos Community College.

It is the perfect way to kick off Women’s History Month as we celebrate Gloria’s first book You Are More Than Good Enough. The book, which I love, combines storytelling, sacred wisdom, practical tools and techniques that will inspire, cajole and catapult readers into an embrace of themselves. In this book, Gloria generously shares the pitfalls, challenges and triumphs of her step-by-step voyage to self-acceptance and self-love in order to embrace her soul’s calling. Readers will learn techniques (techniques that we used during our bi-weekly self-work sessions) – treasures of the soul – that will prepare them to rediscover their true essence, connect to their life purpose and deny any power to an inner critic.  Knowing you are good enough is no small feat but with compassion and understanding Gloria Rodriguez gives us permission to claim the best of who we are with confidence and without apology.

I invite you all to come share a night of beauty, inspiration, and most importanly self-love because we are all more than good enough.

Click on the link for more info or to RSVP to this event:

You Are More Than Good Enough Book Signing/Reception

Learning to be grateful…

Today I am reflecting on all of the new connections that I have made in the past year. Building relationships with encouraging and supportive women is so important. I have been blessed with an amazing network of sisters that ranges from my fellow Visioneras to my childhood friends to those who share my love for creativity and the written word. In short, today I am feeling grateful.

Grateful for all of the women in my life and for all of the blessings that have been bestowed upon me. Sometimes we get so caught up in life and in our daily routines that we forget to step back and just appreciate ourselves, our lives, and the people in it. We often lose focus on what we have because we are too busy worrying about what we don’t have. We have to quit looking at what’s wrong in our lives and start being grateful for what’s right without losing sight of self-improvement.

I would like to share the following passage with you:

“Everything may not be perfect in your life, but if you don’t learn to be happy where you are, you will never get to where you want to be. Do you get up every morning passionate about your dreams? Are you grateful for the home in which you live? We must learn to be happy right where we are. Sometimes we lose our enthusiasm because we let what was once a miracle become too common for us. We get used to it and it becomes routine. We need to go back and remember how God, spirit, and our higher being have brought us to where we are. We need to fan our flame. We need to set our minds and keep it set to higher things.” -Joel Osteen

I believe the higher things are the positive things, so first thing every day, we must set our minds in the right direction. Set our minds for success and victory. Set in our minds that we are going to enjoy this day. Then rise higher and just do it.

Remember, that you have seeds of greatness in you. You weren’t made to be stagnant; rise out of complacency; keep growing, keep reaching for new heights.

Your best days are still out in front of you. As you keep stretching to the next level, improving your life, and reaching for your highest potential, you will not only give birth to your dreams, but you will become a better you, better than you ever dreamed possible.

Fall in Love With You…

“i found god in myself and i loved her. i loved her fiercely.”  - Ntozake Shange

Most of us spend a great deal of our lives looking for love, chasing love, recuperating from love or complaining about love. Never realizing that in our quest for love we are neglecting the person that matters most.  Ourselves.

I believe that as women we often disregard our own needs as a result of always taking care of other people. We spend so much time seeking out and working on developing external relationships that we often times forget to work on the relationship within.  We give so much of ourselves emotionally, physically, and spiritually that  eventually we end up depleted seeking fulfillment from someone else.

However, we can not look to another to fulfill us, “to complete us”, as eloquently stated in Jerry Maguire. We can only seek to fulfill ourselves, to give to ourselves that which we freely give to others; others, who often times don’t deserve it and that is LOVE.  Learn to fall in love with YOU!

Love yourself! Deeply and profoundly! Know that the most important relationship that you could ever have is the relationship that you have with yourself. When that relationship is strong you will see that you will be happier, healthier, and that you will no longer put up with or accept mediocrity from anyone.

Walk in your divine self. You are love, made from love and made to be loved. By loving yourself you teach others how to love you.  Love is not something that comes from someone else; it is an extension of our own minds, reverberating back to us in what seems to be another person’s smile (Williamson, 1993).

When you learn to truly fall in love with you, your entire life begins to change. It changes because when you are in love your main priority is making the person you’re in love with happy. Imagine applying that concept to yourself. Imagine putting your own happiness first. Only you have the power to do this. When you take back your power you take back control of your happiness because you now realize that happiness comes from within. Any happiness that you find with someone else is in addition to the happiness that you already have.

There is no other person on the Universe that can complete you. You were born a “whole” individual, you were not born in pieces. Movies and music will have you believe that in order to be completely happy you need someone else. This is a fallacy. When you allow yourself to believe this you are saying to the other person “I can only be happy if I am with you”…This sort of thinking is the thinking that allows many to stay in hurtful, dysfunctional, abusive relationships because the individual believes that they can only be happy with this abuser. Here’s a reality check if it hurts chances are you aren’t happy. Therefore why stay in a hurtful situation?

I am aware that until we get to the point where  we’ve had enough of things that hurt and long more than anything for a peaceful love, we are bound to take painful roads. We are destined to play out frivolous disasters until we declare ourselves finished and done with them (Williamson, 1993). This is the nature of life but wehen you truly love yourself you will put up with far less nonsense and get out of that unhealthy relationship much sooner.

The following passage I read somewhere and post here for all of you. It reminds me of the power that I have when I choose to take control of my thoughts and feelings.

“You can completely transform any relationship, no matter what it’s like right now.

Every single relationship you have is a reflection of how you feel inside about you. You are a magnet attracting to you all things, via the signal you are emitting through your thoughts and feelings.

Every relationship you have and every interaction with every person, is a reflection of your own thoughts and feelings in that very moment.

To transform every single relationship you have in your life:

Fall in love with YOU!

Make lists of hundreds and hundreds of wonderful things about you.

Keep adding to it every day.

Know that you are perfect. Do not think any negative thoughts about you.

Know that you are worthy and deserving of anything and everything you could possibly want in your life.

Focus on the wonderful things in every person.

Look for only those things.

Do not blame or criticize anybody, ever.
Set an intention that you are going to see the best in everything and everyone.
Make your happiness the number one thing in your life. Happiness is an inside job.

Free yourself of the responsibility of trying to make other people happy.

Respect and love them enough to allow them to take care of their own happiness.
Get your attention off those things in others that don’t make you feel good.

Appreciate and love yourself in every moment you can.

Do not expect others to behave in a way you want, so you will be happy.

Release yourself forevermore and know that you alone control your happiness and it is a choice, no matter what anyone else is doing. Love and respect yourself completely. Know that you are perfect right now.

Forgiveness

We attach our feelings to the moment when we were hurt, endowing it with immortality. And we let it assault us every time it comes to mind. It travels with us, sleeps with us, hovers over us while we make love, and broods over us while we die. Our hate does not even have the decency to die when those we hate die–for it is a parasite sucking OUR blood, not theirs. There is only one remedy for it. Forgiveness.-Lewis B. Smedes 
 
  
Today the word that I am meditating on is FORGIVENESS. It is the first word to come into my mind and so I am paying attention to it. I know that in order to continue growing and to continue healing, we must forgive ourselves and forgive all those who have hurt us.
 
We must forgive if we want to free ourselves of the pain of our past and heal our wounds.  Forgiveness means that you have made the decision to stop being angry at someone. Forgiveness allows us to move forward so that we can live happy, healthy, and productive lives; moving forward means letting go. You can’t move forward when you have chains and shackles holding you back.
 
Forgiving is never easy, but it is necessary for our healing and growth. Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that doesn’t serve us – all of the expectations, all of the beliefs – and becoming who we are destined to be.
 
Letting go of anger and forgiveness are one and the same. The reason we don’t forgive is because we are angry and we are taking something personally. We believe someone deliberately did something to us and that we are a victim. The truth is, that people only hurt others because they are acting out their own inner wounding. Much of which occurred when they were children. As adults, we carry those wounds with us because we have never forgiven all those in our past that have hurt us.
 
Today, forgive yourself for doing all of the things that dishonored who God intended you to be. Forgive yourself for not living up to your fullest potential. Forgive yourself for hurting and disappointing those that you love, including yourself. Forgive yourself for allowing feelings of unworthiness to blind you of your true worth. Forgive yourself for ever doubting that you are great.
 
Forgive yourself for allowing others to disrupt your peace. Forgive those who you let into your life that were only a part of it to take from you and never to give. Forgive yourself for allowing them to use you. Forgive yourself for loving people who were never worthy of your love and forgive yourself for not loving those that were.
 
Forgive yourself for searching for someone to make you happy when all the while happiness resided within. Forgive yourself for not loving yourself enough to know that you deserved better. Forgive all those who have ever wished you harm or unhappiness. Forgive yourself for buying into others’ negative opinions of you. Forgive yourself for believing that you always had to be perfect when all you ever had to be was yourself.
 
Today the word that I am meditating on is FORGIVENESS. I practice forgiveness because it is essential for my spiritual and emotional well being. You should too!

Effectively Working with Affirmations

I found this great article by Katheryn Hoban and wanted to share it with my readers. Enjoy!

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In my years of teaching and counseling I have come to the conclusion that many people are unsure of what affirmations are, how to use them, what great tools they can be, or what good benefits can be manifested by working with affirmations in both children and adults. In the simplest form an affirmation is a statement of a positive effect, result, or of a future event that you would like to achieve. Usually an affirmation is stated in the present moment and in positive verbiage and wordage. For an example “ I can do this” as opposed to “I’d like to do this” or “I’m going to do this.” The sentence “ I can do this” is set in the present moment and it implies confidence in one’s ability to accomplish the task and an immediacy to take action. The statement “ I’d like to do this.” Implies that it is not quite possible but you are yearning to do it but (something out of your control) is preventing that. “I’m going to do this” implies sometime in the future when all the conditions are right. In that case we can make an assumption that the conditions will never be right.

To effectively work and create affirmations for yourself or child it is better to create patterns of repetition in saying the phrase out loud many times per day if need be, or weekly and using a creative visualization technique to anchor the effects of the affirmation in your mind and your body. For an example if you wish to give up smoking. The best way to phrase the affirmation would be “I’m smoke free.” “I enjoy being smoke free.” “ I enjoy being a non-smoker.”
In these examples you would repeat the affirmations and design a creative visualization (of events in the future but seen in present moment time) of you being a fulfilled non-smoker. You could imagine yourself doing an activity and feeling free and joyful that you are without a cigarette. You could imagine that you are visiting with children who previously were reluctant to spend time with you because of your smoking and how much you enjoy that visit. You could imagine that you feel the breath in your lungs very different and that you can actually breathe freely.

In working with children, repetition is a key. You can make it into a game of movement and imagination that children love. The affirmations can be repeated together and new images or visualizations can be incorporated into the game. For instance, I use an affirmation with children that is very powerful and fun and it creates a strong visual image for them. “I stomp out sickness.” When we are in a circle we stomp our feet on the ground and pretend that we are stomping sickness into the earth. They enjoy games and imagery like this immensely and it creates effective anchors.

For adults too the same sort of movement can be used to create an anchor. You interrupt a pattern of stagnation with the new movement. For instance, if you threw your arms up into the air and then out in front of you in a big sweeping gesture, and then said an affirmation such as “I’m free!” “Big pathways are opening up for me!!” You would immediately feel the vibrancy and the expansion of that affirmation. An anchor of thought and the physical action would then be created in your mind. Every time that you said that affirmation, and did that gesture of the big sweeping arm movements a thought of freedom and lightness would be interpreted into your brain. You would begin to feel the joy associated with that movement and those words.

On repeating the affirmations, a new pattern of hope, expectancy and action would be created for future moments to unfold. Of course you don’t have to make a big physical gesture to interrupt the pattern of thought. However when you can add physical movements, gestures or sounds, the affirmation becomes more effective and can promote a transformation more quickly. If you can picture in your mind the thing that you want to achieve, as if it is already done, and you are feeling wonderful about receiving it, that combined with the affirmation is a very effective tool of change.

Let’s look at some affirmations. “I’m easily and effortlessly attracting the right business contacts to promote my work.” If you imagined in your mind; the smiles, the handshakes and the business meeting going very well and the ultimate picture of you receiving the benefits of new business and the achieving the results that you want and need every time that you said that affirmation, you begin to attract what you are confirming to the universe.

“I am fearless.” If you said this out loud it would be very effective to raise your voice and emphasis the word fearless. If you raised your hand in a strong gesture it further anchors the strength and courage that you feel in your body. The visual image that may go along with “I am fearless,” could be seeing yourself confronting a strong adversary and you looking right into his or her eyes and feeling in your heart that you are too strong to cower, and that you are planted firmly to the Earth.

“I can do this easily and effortlessly.” Imagine yourself in the zone so to speak where you barely make any effort at all and everything falls into place. Feel in your body and heart, how joyful, casual and confident you are about everything coming quickly together for you. Use an example in your past successes when something came together just as easily and remember how happy and light you felt when it did.

“I am the perfect weight for me.” Instead of focusing on how much weight you wish to lose, which implies that you are not perfect as you are, focus on how it would feel to fit into the size jeans that you always wanted to fit into. Also focus on how good it would feel in your slim clothing and seeing yourself in the mirror at the weight that your body looks absolutely fabulous in. See yourself very energized with your newly trim fit body, and how then you would act, walk, run, play and enjoy yourself.

Affirmations are best spoken out loud; the vibrations of the spoken positive expression are impactful to your psyche or a child’s. They are also best repeated until a new pattern is created. Create your own affirmations, or read from a book of affirmations, or listen to affirmations on tapes or CD’s. Keep revisiting these affirmations daily. Affirmations build confidence, help you to overcome low self-esteem, create balance, and space, helps you to get past feelings of guilt, and condemnation, clears obstacles, or limitations, create new patterns of health and well-being, and may produce feelings of prosperity and abundance. Of course Affirmations are not a cure-all, but they are very powerful and effective tools for you and your child to transform a challenging area in life. Every time that you say an affirmation with conviction you are creating a new unfolding moment to engage in a new fulfilled, balance, healthy, or abundant way of being.
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Katheryn Hoban is a certified yoga teacher and Reiki Master teacher with 10 years of experience. She has created two CD on affirmations. (Affirmations for Children and Teens and Affirmations for Adults.)
She can be reached at PO Box 7564 North Bergen, NJ 07047 or e-mail katscoolcorner@yahoo.com. You can purchase each CD for $10 + 2.00 shipping and handling or with paypal.
Wholesale prices are also available for a minimum purchase of 10 CD’s @$4.00 per CD plus $1.00 shipping ($50.00). Paypal is also an acceptable form of payment.

Happy New Year

I can’t believe it’s a new year. 2011 seemed to go by so quickly.  So much has happened since my last blog post and I apologize that I haven’t posted anything since September. Shame on me. I am back and I am committed to posting at least one new blog a week. I will try to get back to my daily posting, but I’m so busy lately that it may be a little challenging.

First, let me start by telling you what I’ve been doing these past 3 months. As many of you know, in my last blog I was preparing for my first book release. The turnout was amazing. The room was full of love, positive energy, and individuals who all took time out of their day to support me. It’s amazing how when you set out to do something great the Universe somehow provides you with exactly what you need at that time. Needless to say I sold a lot of books and was able to re-connect with people that I haven’t seen in years. It was a truly memorable night.

During that same time, I also started a new job as the Associate Director of Operations of one of NYC’s public hospitals. Trying to adjust to a new position takes some time, but I’m finally starting to get into the swing of things. Additionally, I am slated to begin my first semester in the MFA in Creative Writing program that I was accepted into.  The New York City Latinas Writer’s Group workshops will also begin this month with me as one of the facilitators. There are so many good things in store for me this year and I am ready for whatever the Universe has to offer.

As we all embrace the new year let’s do so knowing that we are capable of doing anything that we set our minds to. Be great in all that you do and you will create greatness. Expand your mind, open your heart, and grab 2012 by the horns and run with it. Make this year YOUR year.

For more info on the New York City Latina’s Writers Group visit our FB page http://www.facebook.com/?ref=tn_tnmn#!/groups/81895133392/

The Waters Within

My parched lips search for
the sweetness of steady waters
I search for the endless
rhythm of the ocean
so that I may bathe myself in
velvet hopes of new beginnings.
My heart tugs strings weaving back
together the strands of my soul
Intricate tapestry folds peeking through
the veil of my truth that reminds me
of the beauty that lies within.

Once dried up inside,
baptize me so that I may be reborn
an oasis rising from a sandy wasteland
created to quench the thirst of 1 million skies.
Cleanse me with daily gratitude,
trust, patience, fruitfulness, and love.

For your rippled waves
have awakened dormant dreams
that once flowed through me
like the great Nile River.
Through parted waters
and into the desert of infancy
I found myself again.
I valued myself again
I loved myself again.

And when the tides change
Because they always do,
I will take shelter in the land of Me.
For I have now found my voice.
I have now found my light.
I have now found my strength.
I am caught in a spiritual current.
I am now transformed.